As a mom I’m constantly wondering if what I’m doing and how we’re choosing to live is enough for our kids. Questions like, “is this going to permanently damage our kids socially?” and “is this really the right thing to do?” and “what if we are doing it wrong?” and “what if they really are missing out?” seem to be a constant sometimes.
You see, I believe God has given us 4 incredible gifts. Those gifts come with a responsibility. We, as parents, have been put in charge of 4 souls and it’s our responsibility to teach and train and show those four souls the best way to live so that someday they can make good and right decisions and live full lives on their own. As a parent, the weight of that responsibility can be pretty heavy at times.
It’s in those heavy moments that I begin to ask God and question our motives, actions, and the way we’ve chosen how to live. It was during one of those moments this morning, that a verse came to me from Matthew 6:33:
“Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness
and all these things will be given to you as well.”
It caused me to stop my second-guessing and reflect back on the last few years. As I look back at the fruit that has been sown in our kiddos, I’m in awe. I see our kiddos having conversations with adults. I see our daughters blossoming from shy and insecure bullied students to strong, secure young women. I see the experiences that have affected their world-view and their desires to make our world a better place in their own unique way, using the gifts they’ve been given and wanting to bless others. These are the fruits I see.
These fruits have not come without our own fair share of praying. Looking back, I also see our decisions covered in prayers for wisdom and direction. Prayers filled with questions, longings, pain and distrust. Prayers also filled with trust, love, and genuine-ness. I see tears, anger, frustration and then peace, hope, and anticipation. I believe God has heard all those prayers and has been working in our hearts as we seek Him in this life-journey. Now, here we are, and it’s when I look back at who our kids were and who they are now that I see the work God has done, the healing He has done, and I praise Him.
I think, in the end, maybe it’s not so much about whether we’re doing it wrong or right, but whether we’re seeking the Lord and loving our kids the best we know how and trusting the God will take care of the rest.